I also developed some strange habits. I love my baby more than I could have ever imagined and can't wait to have him or her. It took a very long time to learn to draw confidence from within, and although I'm more secure in myself and who I am now I still struggle with insecurity. I don't talk about this or how uncomfortable it makes me to anyone because I'm afraid of being thought of as self-centered, when that's the last thing I'm trying to do. Is there a way to get creeps to back the hell off, and is there some secret to attracting a nice respectful man I don't know about? TLDR: I am uncomfortable with male attention because of childhood trauma. If the supervisor says you must then talk to his supervisor. Tell them this man makes you very uncomfortable and what he has done and tell your superior you don't want to help this man. I am 5 months post op and have lost 93lbs. Is there something I can do to get over that? I can't tell you how to alleviate your problem because I have the same problem. Popular on Panda Gossips. A I know from my past that this attention makes me nervous and for some reason causes me to eat. I just want advice on how to deal with this, because honestly, getting any kind of male attention usually makes me uncomfortable. The attention makes me uncomfortable Am I the only one who is uncomfortable with all the attention being pregnant? New York. Well, here’s the thing: if you feel uncomfortable as a result of this man’s attentions, that’s the only measure you need to worry about. When he tells you you’re beautiful, you shake your head.You can’t help it. One thing that I cannot stand is lustful attention from males. People think I'm cold. I also used to have severe social anxiety, and to this day it still flares up from time to time. When someone's uncomfortable, they may take a step back without even realizing it. Women reveal the everyday things they do to avoid unwanted male attention. It’s an automatic reaction. You can’t stand PDA. But with me its to the point of not wanting to go in places becuase I know men will be checking me out/hitting on me/talking about me to whoever their with. But since you didn't exactly grow up with this, generally girls are sick and tired of hearing fox whistles and 'Oh Baby' all the time. Use the above list to create your own fear hierarchy for being the center of attention. He constantly says inappropriate things and talks about sexual topics in the class. It’s a jungle out there. I'll be sitting alone in the dining hall when it's uncrowded from time to time and I'll overhear guys talking about me from 20 feet away. But when I tried to explain the situation to a male friend, he looked at me blankly. Most often, being looked at or stared at by a stranger (especially men I don't know) triggers it and makes me feel nervous and very uncomfortable. Better pay attention. Sending over drinks. You're so young, you're still becoming yourself and you will find a way to deal with the compliments so don't worry about it. I'm afraid of receiving attention or compliments about my looks from men. Romance can make us blind to all the signs that we're in a bad relationship. At age 19 I "blossomed" so to speak: I lost a lot of weight, no longer had acne, and my long curly hair was no longer unmanageable and frizzy. When you’re in a room full of family members on Thanksgiving, you don’t want your boyfriend to rest his hand on your thigh, let alone kiss you on the lips. It's the same thing with me, so I would want to say its normal. It sucks don't it? I fought the urge to jump off the table and run for the waiting room the entire time. Don't have an account? Clearly, if you’re the target of such unwanted attention, you know just how miserable it makes you feel that certain parts of your body are being examined in excruciating detail. This article made me feel so much better and firmer in my view point on this. They usually turn around and say F. Off. 1. I don't consider myself especially pretty, I think I'm average looks-wise honestly, but for some reason I seem to attract a lot of attention from men, which I generally perceive as the negative kind because not only will they stare, but some will follow me around a store or down the street. reader, Odds  +, writes (9 May 2011): A It seems very superficial to me. When The Nice Guy Down The Street Makes You Uncomfortable. But all the attention these boys are giving me makes me angry at myself for not feeling the same way. As a feminist, it pains me to admit that I got so much validation from male attention. You should talk to your supervisor. Here are things men do all the time that make women uncomfortable. Use the term sexual harassment - that usually gets an employer's attention. It would be nice to be able to return affection. At age 19 I "blossomed" so to speak: I lost a lot of weight, no longer had acne, and my long curly hair was no longer unmanageable and frizzy. save hide report. I never felt comfortable in my own skin and hated myself. Most students laugh because the jokes are funny but there is a bit of creepiness I feel behind them. I'll just be flattered. I'm on the same boat, so I'll quickly share my thoughts on this topic. I haven't gotten too much attention growing up, from guys; however, recently I've been getting a ton. Particularly if you have a history of sexual trauma, ask in advance of an invasive procedure to have only female clinicians present. Recently one of them just has negative vibes when we go out and she likes male attention too If people don’t confront this, they will scare away good people. I walked out of there before anything could happen. There's a few possible answers (not going to repeat what the others already said on here, but their answers are also possible): 1. Not too long ago a guy I've never seen before looked at me as I was walking by his table in there and said completely seriously "you're fine." If a man offers to buy us a drink, that’s one thing—we can say no. Unfortunately the guy he hooked me up with gave me major heebie jeebies. 1) If a guy (or anyone at all, really) is making me feel uncomfortable, I should pay attention to that feeling rather than making excuses for the person/telling myself I'm being silly/etc. I’m going back home for holiday and invited 2 of my friends. They think I can't hear them, but I can, and it makes me feel embarrassed. After what happened to me last week I have been scared and anxious to go to that class. He made inappropriate jokes and having him touch me was horribly uncomfortable. Being coldly polite is a good way to handle certain situations. Since the begging of the year I have always felt a bit weird around him. Credit: Shutterstock. Just save the truth to spare feelings and go deep within. Men like this make me feel as though they think I only have one thing to offer, and in the vast majority of my experiences with straight men, it does often come down to sex and how soon they can get it from me. Promisingly, there have been efforts to make wolf whistling a hate crime in the UK. My teacher is a male around 35 years old. 2) I don't need to be nice to everyone. 6 comments. I don’t think I am unusual in this respect. Leaders’ Quest, LLC 208-10 Cross Island Parkway #107 Bayside, New York 11360 USA MAP ; T. +1 646 630 7336 E. darya.shaikh@leadersquest.org It's strange to even me, but I blame it on being 'socially awkward', even though I'm really not. Login first male I HATE when someone is interested in me, and I am clearly not, because I know how that feels all too well. Since gaining the weight i am looking more like a woman now but feel very uncomfortable with any attention i get from men. 2. If you find that your anxiety is severe or that you are unable to face these types of situations at all, you should consider contacting your doctor or a mental health professional for diagnosis and a treatment plan . How to normal women get a grip on it and manage it? Often, the task at hand seems impossible; but starting a more open and honest conversation about it is definitely the way forward. It makes me feel very put on the spot and uncomfortable. ... which probably makes me an asshole, but I literally couldn’t deal with anymore of him yelling at me and insulting my family. Same here. All my friend think that I am weird and have often referred to be as gay. 1. at work, confidence, my ex. Lol. I basically feel invisible to the opposite sex. Obviously I don’t base my worth off male attention, and in most instances it makes me uncomfortable, but it would be nice to know that someone was interested in me from time to time. I am in recovery from anorexia and am now at a healthy weight. Not all of it is good, in fact most of it is from guys I am not attracted to. I wanted a hole to develop and swallow me. From that moment on my guard is up, I hate this feeling and have to face it very often. Feb 12, 2014 - Hmmm...interesting how this makes me uncomfortable. Just once, I'd like to be spoken to like a human being, not stared down like a piece of meat. Tonight I was sitting alone again at my favorite table in an inconspicuous corner and two guys were talking about my hair. It makes me want to punch them in the face, but if I know them personally ,then I won't react like that. 2. The Uncomfortable Truth about Male Loneliness. As a young woman, during my teen years I've never considered myself very pretty, I was and still am very introverted. Insecurities, vulnerabilities, low self-esteem, low self-confidence, low value and even lack of self-love are potential problems to address. share. ... Each morning, I would look forward to the familiar nod of a corner shop owner who sold me the New York Times. But what happens when someone you’re not into decides to try their luck? All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft, Register in under one minute and get your own agony aunt column. It’s a self value, respect and love problem to always feel this way... let me say its your life it shouldnt matter what other girls like but alas i am but ananamous voice and its likely i shall never be heard but its your life not thiers live how YOU feel is right alright kid? Add your answer to this question! Right, so some backstory, through most of my years in middle and high school I was mocked daily for being ugly. reader, anonymous, writes (12 May 2011): A One sarcastically dared the other to come up to me and ask to rub their face in my hair, and noted "but you have to pay attention to her facial expression the most when you ask her this." female Help us keep this site organized and clean. There are people who understand and live with it. have recently developed a huge fear of male attention. Any kind of attention makes me uncomfortable. I don't want to get the guy in trouble, he's never really said or done anything completely disrespectful. Many guys will not deal with this inner conflict women present. It makes me wonder what on earth we can do to change this type of behaviour. Apparently all that fat is some kind of barrier. ... Know and respect your boundaries if the attention from a married man makes you feel uncomfortable. I get really defensive and angry. View related questions: Register in under one minute and get your own agony aunt column - recommended! I just want advice on how to deal with this, because honestly, getting any kind of male attention usually makes me uncomfortable. It is difficult to accept the fact that the loves of our lives can also possess awful, sometimes dangerous qualities. You never know whether you’re going to run into a friendly fellow pack-member or a creepy-as-fuck predator. Some people. PreCloud Technologies help you build useful Salesforce.com Solutions, Blockchain Developments, Mobile Apps, Web Developments, IOT, AI, IT Maintenance Support Services & Digital Marketing. At work some men will call me "babe" or "precious thing" in that condescending way. Still. Akshaye Khanna: Any kind of attention makes me uncomfortable Madhureeta Mukherjee Akshaye Khanna, the suave actor, with attitude galore and talent to boot, is uninhibited and unapologetic during the hour-long riveting chat before the release of his upcoming film 'Mom' It makes me feel very put on the spot and uncomfortable. I know that I am heterosexual but most of the time, the looks that I get make me uncomfortable. Do other girls actually like receiving attention from men and compliments on their looks? Thanks. 80% Upvoted. I don’t mind and even love black humor, but making someone look crazy, gaslighting (especially when everyone around the person believes in the weirdness going on), or embarrassing people just doesn’t make me … I know that it seems in direct contrast with what I do. If the Me Too movement teaches us anything it is that women have felt for too long as if they can’t speak out when men pay them unwelcome attention, for fear of seeming to exaggerate their concerns. It's annoying and makes me uncomfortable, I'm not saying it's hell on earth or some devastating issue, I just felt like it's something that needed to be talked about. I felt frozen and didn't know what to say. It just makes me uncomfortable for the person being embarrassed. Hope people can find their peace. I believe, IMHO, people who feel uncomfortable getting too much attention from someone must address their unresolved issues. POPULAR. My instant reaction to a compliment is to get defensive or just completely ignore them, I can safely say I despise them. It’s unfair to offend people by telling them their over-attention makes them uncomfortable. As a young woman, during my teen years I've never considered myself very pretty, I was and still am very introverted. I don't talk about this or how uncomfortable it makes me to anyone because I'm afraid of being thought of as self-centered, when that's the last thing I'm trying to do. Walking through town today, i felt so self aware because some construction workers whistled at me. I wonder if anyone else has this problem. Not everyone judges. reader, Gherkinsaregrim  +, writes (8 May 2011): Already have an account? IMO, counseling may be necessary to discuss this issue. Pay attention to these signs, for an experienced man will be very subtle. I am beginning to get looks and attention from men when I was pretty invisible before. It's easy to say "take a compliment" when you're so self conscious, I think it's a confidence issue and as you have never received male attention before I suppose it's a bit of a shock to the system. You have trouble accepting compliments. As members of a species that reproduces sexually, sexual attention is a sometimes awesome, sometimes disturbing part of human life. But I didn’t. I'm afraid of receiving attention or compliments about my looks from men. That's just what I say to people to keep from going out to places. 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